ForeverMissed
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In memory and honor of Tav Sparks (Augustus Octavius Bacon Sparks III):

“The first principle of true teaching is that nothing can be taught.”
“One who loves God finds the object of his love everywhere.”
“Trust the divine power, and she will free the godlike elements in you and shape all into an expression of divine nature.”
All quotes from Sri Aurobindo, Tav’s most read and loved teacher
Dear friends, family, loved ones,

On Sunday, August 9, my beloved – our beloved - Tav left us to head into the great mystery.  As many of you know - because, like so much else in his life, he was open about what he was experiencing - Tav had been dealing with memory loss and cognitive decline for the past eight or so years.

At first, we attributed this to tiny strokes that showed up on his first MRI, and were optimistic about his healing. In early 2020, after new scans, he was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease. In between, over the past several years, Tav and I devoted ourselves to a wide range of healing methods - medical, alternative, and spiritual. He was willing to work hard at anything that had a chance, even a remote one, of helping him. Sadly, they made little or no difference. As time went on, his loss progressed at an increasing rate. 

He could no longer do the work he loved: teaching and being with others on their journeys of spirituality and personal healing. We knew he was facing the possibility of a long, slow decline full of pain and indignity that would have been terribly hard on Tav and those closest to him. Instead, he started on a path that led to a dignified, honorable, incredibly courageous death at the time of his choosing. It seems way too soon, and yet in terms of the window of opportunity, it would have been too late had he waited much longer. 

I know this loss will hit many of you hard. Tav was a huge light in this world for so many people. All of his life, he was a seeker of truth and the deeper mysteries of life and beyond.  And his devotion to this quest spoke to others. Beginning from his earliest years in Macon, Georgia; through his “hippie days” (as he called them); then coming out of addiction as he embraced the Twelve-Step program and community; and all throughout his years as a devoted and gifted teacher, writer, and breathwork practitioner, Tav always emerged as a guide to others on their own inner journeys. 

He didn’t do this on purpose, it just happened. People saw who he was, they saw what his being was all about, and this spoke to many of them. Rather than cultivate this attention, he did the opposite. He regularly went inward in deep and ongoing practice – with breathwork, meditation and other work on himself. He constantly read the most profound spiritual texts from all traditions. And he lived what he learned, what both of those paths had to teach. He was, first and foremost, about being in service.

Tav walked his talk. When something wasn’t working in his life, when there was conflict, at some point he would always, always go within, look at himself, and then apologize, even when he had nothing to apologize for. He relied on the support of the Great Mother, who he referred to as Big Mama. He connected with many deep spiritual traditions and teachers, especially in Ireland and Australia. He hugged trees; gently patted moss, rocks, and whatever horse I had in my life; was constantly awed by clouds and fog; loved swans and hawks, ravens and vultures. He adored Layla, our calico kitty, who doesn’t like to be petted but would lay across Tav’s legs every night as we watched TV.

Tav’s love of his close family was deep and he often wished he could get back East more often to see his son Ason, daughter-in-law April, their sons Dallin, Kellen and Lochlan, and Ason’s mother Joyce. He was incredibly proud of the men Ason and our son Bryn have become and shared with them the family passion for Georgia football, and the eternal quest for a national championship.

When we did get back to Georgia, it delighted him to visit his sisters Tricia and Jackie and brother-in-law John. Tav’s brother Bill was also often part of the crew until his own passing in 2016. We’d laugh, listen to music, have ridiculously good meals, and of course watch football, often joined by John’s brothers and many old friends, all with wild, funny stories about their escapades. Tav counted the time he spent with the Allman Brothers in Macon during his early twenties as among the most meaningful of his life. 

Tav was one of the first long-haired hippies in Macon, an enthusiastic early proponent of LSD, which led to his first major spiritual awakening, and belonged to more than one commune.  He had more adventures than I could count, and I always wished he would write them all down for a book, which he started in recent years but didn’t finish.

Tav was incredibly generous of himself, his time, anything he had to give. He’d want the best of whatever was available to go to others. He would stay with a breather for countless hours. He loved to prepare food for people; to share the movies and music he loved; to see the best in each person he encountered; and to keep telling and showing them what he saw until they saw it too. 

He was a brilliant teacher with an incredible mind. He wove magic into his work with self-deprecating humor, extravagantly elegant mannerisms, quirky southern expressions, and a knowledge of spiritual systems and understanding of holotropic principles that went both deep and wide.  He would always worry about messing up, but somehow when he started to speak, it flowed through him in a way that was both inspired and inspiring.

Tav wrote and had published three deep and wide-ranging books on spirituality and healing relating to addiction recovery, movie-watching and the holotropic paradigm, plus a book of poetry and a training manual, and five professionally recorded CDs that give listeners a feel for his teaching. Even before he lost his memory, whenever he’d pick up one of his books and look at it, he’d be surprised and say, “I wrote that?” as if it was too good to have come from him.  You might not know that he also wrote seven screenplays, with the same talent and flair that he brought to everything else he did. 

I believe Tav’s greatest lasting contributions – in addition to our memories of him, his books, and recordings of his teaching - are the Awareness Positioning System (APS) and his fierce devotion to what he termed “Radical Personal Empowerment.”  This last takes the concept of the inner healing impulse and extends it as far as it’s possible to go.  In healing work, there is nothing more essential to a person’s well-being than that which comes from within – and anything that doesn’t support, or leads away from, that emergence is doing the person a disservice and taking power from where it belongs, which is with the individual.  

Toward the end, when his brain wasn’t working too well any longer, Tav became almost pure love.  The crackling fire he’d always been had become a glowing ember, but that ember was unadulterated, bright and strong.  The idea of radical personal empowerment became two simple words, and he wanted everyone he had contact with during those last days to hear them and believe them: “Trust yourself.”

Writing this is one of the most painful yet profound things I’ve ever done. I wish he could read it and take it in, but of course he’d never believe it.  I wish he could be here to edit it, as we’ve always done with each other’s writing, both professional and personal. I’m sure he’d find every last misplaced comma or not-quite-right word. And I’d sigh, and be a little annoyed, and know he was right, and change it. 

Someday, I might tell the entire story of our time together, the journey we were on with each other, with breathwork, with incredible friendships and nature and music, with the gifts of the world in so many physical and spiritual manifestations. One of the last things we said to each other was, “We had a good run.” I think we all had a good run with Tav. It just wasn’t long enough.

Even though the Tav who left us on Sunday wasn’t the Tav I’d met 34 years ago, he was somehow more of himself than ever, and I will miss him every day. Right now, I don’t know if I will ever stop crying. I know many of you will cry too. I visualize our collective sadness as Tav’s way of bringing people and communities together once more, to be real and to feel deeply, in spirit as he did in life. 

To honor Tav’s memory, I think he would love for you to watch movies, listen to music, visit with trees, TRUST YOURSELF, and find the object of God/Goddess’s love everywhere.

To say something for or about Tav, what he meant to you, or (best of all) tell a story, we’ve established this memorial page. 

Celebration of Life gatherings for Tav will be held as soon as it is safe to do so, probably in California, in Macon, and perhaps in Europe so his many friends there can gather too.   

In lieu of flowers, if you feel like making a donation in Tav’s memory, we are suggesting either 
Final Exit Network or MusiCares (general donation/in memory of).

With love and deep gratitude always,
Cary Sparks

By Neil Young, one of Tav’s absolute favorite musicians, from the songs Look Out for My Love (1978) and Harvest Moon (1992):

I'm home again to you babe
You know it makes me wonder
Sittin' in the quiet slipstream
In the thunder.

Come a little bit closer
Hear what I have to say
Just like children sleepin'
We could dream this night away

But there's a full moon risin'
Let's go dancin' in the light
We know where the music's playin'
Let's go out and feel the night

December 23, 2023
December 23, 2023
Blessings to you Cary. Such a beautiful image. With love. Donna
August 9, 2023
August 9, 2023
All my remembrances of Tav are filled with love and gratitude. Today and always.
August 3, 2023
Every breathwork and movieyoga I remember Tav and feel his support. I'm blessed I've met him in my life. Thank you, Tav, for all your heart, support, love.
August 3, 2023
August 3, 2023
Dearest Cary, Thinking of you at this time and sending you much love.  Whenever dear Tav comes to mind my heart opens with fond memories of his presence and generous heart that he shared with us all. He enriched my life beyond anything I could have imagined for which I am eternally grateful. I remember the one thing that he always said, "trust yourself."
With appreciation for you too dear soul, Cary, for being and all that you do.
Light, love, and may we all know peace in our hearts,
Blessings, Zoë 
August 3, 2023
August 3, 2023
Dearest Cary,
I think and speak of you and Tav so often, but especially on this anniversary date I want to reaffirm my deep love and gratitude for having you and Tav in my life.
Always in my heart.
Donna Rosenthal
October 30, 2022
October 30, 2022
I remember Tav telling me before each breathwork “Alls ya gotta do is show up”. He spoken southern. I felt loved and at home. I have never forgotten his words and continue to hear them in my soul.
October 23, 2022
October 23, 2022
I was almost 3 months sober when I met Tav in Hampton, VA with Jim & Judith Nourse. My 1st ever Holotropic Breathwork! Amazing. Tav was loving and kind & encouraged me to "keep coming back," a now familiar saying in 12 step recovery. I'm about to celebrate 31 years of sobriety. The work with Tav and Cary and my fellow travelers in the Hotropic realm, has taken me into the space where I now know why I met Tav! To learn to love and value this precious life we've been given, and to cherish the journey toward healing that doesn't exist in our time...but in God's! "Surrender to Healing" is my story. This story continues to unfold. The Breathwork and meditation prepared me for my being able to be present when my mother died. Now I see that her mental illness, not her hatred toward me, was why she locked me in closets and in crawl spaces with mice. I cherish the many times Tav held me while I released so many traumas deeply stored in my body & soul. I'm not so sure I'd be alive today if you, dear Tav, had not loved me unconditionally for our time together. Thank you Tav Sparks ❤️❤️❤️ Love you brother ❤️
August 10, 2022
August 10, 2022
Tav, you are always in hour hearts. Two years already. The perpetual light is with you my friend.

Rest in peace & big hugs to Cary

August 9, 2022
August 9, 2022
I remember Tav telling us how he stayed on after a breathwork course in a hotel because the woman who had been breathing could not move. She had somehow become paralysed. He told us that he stayed there for another two days until they had helped her through her process. I was touched at his dedication which some course leaders would not even consider.
August 9, 2022
August 9, 2022
I was doing my undergrad work in the addictions field & had recently experienced my first HBW session at Esalen. I read an article about a guy in Georgia doing some really innovative work with addicts & HBW so I contacted Christina to say Wow! She informed me that "the guy" had been hired by GTT & was coming to California. I was hooked. Tav has had a special place in my heart since 1987 or so - such compassion & generosity of spirit is so rare but his has transformed so many. I will always love you, Tav, & I send my love to Cary as well. You both changed my life (starting back when I was still Chris-Ann Gordon!) Thank you, thank you!
August 9, 2022
August 9, 2022
Remembering you dear Tav today. Every time you come to mind my heart softens and I am thankful for having known you and having received the many blessings and support you gave me and so many others, especially during holotropic breathwork experiences. You were and remain a great gift to all of us.
May peace live in all hearts . . . in fond remembrance and love, Zoë
August 9, 2022
August 9, 2022
I remember playing "Ripple" by the Grateful Dead at my certification. As I started I heard Tav say ,"that's one of my favorite songs." I was so honored I don't think I made any mistakes, very unusual :)
August 4, 2022
August 4, 2022
Hard to fathom it's been two years. And 8 years since I surfaced from my first BW session to see this man on his knees beside me. In that moment, he taught me the most fluent lesson of all, without uttering a word; to live like Tav. It's time to read "The Power Within" again.

"I would love to live like a river flows, carried by the surprise of its own unfolding." John O'Donohue
August 3, 2022
August 3, 2022
Remembering Your Birthday
Miss You, Tav
I am blessed to have had your presence in my life
Sending love to Cary, Bryn and the whole family
August 3, 2022
August 3, 2022
Tav’s light will always shine brightly. Much love to Cary and to all who shared in Tav’s wisdom and giant heart.
August 9, 2021
August 9, 2021
Tav, missing your light in the world. Feeling love as I remember your fierce love for this entire Holotropic community.
August 4, 2021
August 4, 2021
Remembering you, Tav! Your life and work impacted on my live so profoundly.
Sending deep GRATITUDE. I miss you.

Sending much love to Cary, Bryn and the whole family.
August 3, 2021
August 3, 2021
I will remember and love Tav all of my days. To have had my path cross with his has been a profound and lasting gift. There is more light in the world because of his presence. 
August 3, 2021
August 3, 2021
Dear Tav, Thank you once again for your gentle kindness in teaching me to trust breath, myself, and for bringing me through to know myself more extensively. I treasure the memories of having known you and the blessing that we traveled through life together for a while, always to be held in my heart.
. . . with aloha dear soul, Zoë
August 3, 2021
August 3, 2021
I was privileged to meet Tav, even if only for a few days. His light and sound were shared all too briefly here. Observing his birthday, my feeling is that the energy that Tav embodied is something eternal. We need more of such energy and the qualities that he radiated. We need it here and now, but it may serve to special value in other realms. It is certainly not always easy to share our loved ones. May we feel his presence walking beside us without undue strain.
January 9, 2021
January 9, 2021
Tav was my roommate in prep school in Virginia. Neither he nor I really fit in but we were best of friends. So sorry to lose him but he was a sweet person , even when I knew him and he was 16.
October 24, 2020
October 24, 2020
I first met Tav in 2006 at a training module and was immediately blown away by his presence, his caring, his kindness, and his dedication to and passion for Holotropic Breathwork and to making the world a better place to live in. He was the best teacher that I have ever met whether it was at a Holotropic Breathwork module, at a Movie Yoga module, at my Certification Module or anywhere else. He was one of the inspirational figures in my life and the person who inspired me to become a Holotropic Breathwork Facilitator. To me, he represented compassion, presence and a deep commitment to doing his own inner work and I feel remarkably lucky and honored to have had Tav be my teacher. He was remarkably giving of his time and energy and up until the day he passed away, I always knew that if I had a question about HB Facilitation or about a contraindication or anything else, he would always make himself available to answer it.

In HB Workshops, his ability to work with and stay present with breathers over an extended period of time was remarkable. When a breather needed support and Tav came over, the breather knew that time no longer existed for Tav and that he would stay there as long as necessary to allow the breather to complete his or her process. He was the quintessential model of how a facilitator should be with a breather and he brought that understanding and also his deep understanding and trust of the "Inner Healer" to me and into the entire HB facilitator training program.

His book, "The Power Within", which he published last year, is one of the most profound books that I have ever read and is a testament to personal empowerment and transformation and his deep commitment to his own inner work. He writes:

"Engaging in any systematic deep work over a period of time will almost certainly reveal to us a way to find a true lasting freedom, independent of outside circumstances..within us all along has been a force more powerful than any the outside world can offer...this unlimited power is none other than the Inner Healer, or what we also call, in our inquiry, the power within."

This is a deep and profound loss for me. The world has lost a beautiful soul.

October 13, 2020
October 13, 2020
One thing I loved about Tav that he really embraced all there was in being human. He really helped me to understand and embody what wholeness was really all about. When I was in a particular challenging place he would speak to me in a language I loved – Myth. In True Lord of the Rings style he said:

“Like Samwise Gamgee told Frodo, when they were in Mordor, and they were looking down on an army of 10,000 orcs between them and mount doom, "There's nothing for it..." like, we got no choice but to go down this hill and keep on doing it...and that's what they did, and they got there, and after frodo came flying out of mt doom, and it was all crashing down around them, you know, his face was all lit up again, and he said, "It's gone -- it's done -- I can see the shire..."so, when i'm in my own version of your place, i think of this, and truth be told, it will shift -- it always does. all i can do is tell you what i see: i feel i know your heart and soul -- and when i see you, or think of you, i see the depth of you, who you really are, and i have no worries about you at all from that place.”

These words still resonate with me often. What a gift among many other gifts. I honestly feel like one of the lucky ones having known him. So I can’t really say enough but this will do for now. From your swan tattoo, your wild shirts, southern accent and Gieger skull ring, I love you. Rest well in the Beloved. You will be missed greatly.
October 11, 2020
October 11, 2020
Wild Rice casserole. He brought wild rice casserole to Thanksgiving and then regaled me with the care and ingredients that were in it - many deriving from home in Macon and some from the hippy-dippy farmer's market. But in that way that dish was all Tav. And he was curious - always wanting to know more about things he knew and things he didn't and I love that about him. And his hugs. It's rare that people who are not my immediate family will hug me the way he did because of my size but he hugged completely and unabashedly...like he lived the rest of his life. That wild rice casserole was the best I've ever had, before or since because it was all him. That's what I will remember fondly is the way he brought all of himself to every interaction and every moment...I am sad we don't have him on this planet anymore but sure do like imagining he and my mom laughing and cooking together. May you find peace in the sorrow.
September 3, 2020
September 3, 2020
Dear Tav,
I am grateful that you came into my life at the GTT module "the power within" in Csech Republic. It was my first module ever a few weeks after my first double breathwork at peace castle in Austria. It had saved me from a deep crisis after my mother's passing. I remember this inspiring practise of Movie yoga, your teachings of the yoga of the cross, your loving and strong presence in the breathwork sessions, your humorous and honest telling of your life story, how you struggled with addiction and overcame it. I remember your bright and encouraging look when I asked for admission to the GGT as you said "welcome, go for it". I remember the following hug holding your tender body, so fragile and though so strong. I remember your basic teaching: support, support, support. I remember your closing: completion within the incompletion. I had expected to do the certification closure with you. this is not possible anymore in physical reality. your spirit is still here in my heart and always will be. but I miss you as a whole human being so that makes me feel sad. 
August 31, 2020
August 31, 2020
Dear Tav,
I had the privilege and joy to meet you once in Kildare, Ireland in November 2012 in the enchanted Shell Cottage, where you shared with us the magic, wisdom and ingenious teaching of Movie Yoga, and yourself. I hold this weekend, hosted by Geoff Fitzpatrick, deep in my heart, and continue to keep the Movie Yoga teachings alive in my life and work. It was only the day before Cary sent out the email about your passing that your teaching on Will and Grace popped into Consciousness as I walked down a path, and I smiled, outwardly and inwardly. a profound teaching I walk with everyday.

I smile now, as I look at all the photos shared, and the abundance of a life fully lived - the greatest gift we can give.

I recall you saying that weekend how you loved Swans, and how blessed you had felt to see one that morning. Your love of swans brings forth a beautiful quote from a lesser known John O'Donoghue poem, that in many ways, speaks of BPM II, and the pointing back to the mystery of the Who that we really are.
In deep love, le gra an domhain.
Julie

Exiled Clay  

I am not sure you
live here anymore, no cord
of clay holds
you moored.

The air is brittle
and cannot settle
near your attention.

Your call has
no cloister , for
abandon anoints you.

To what place
belongs the red bush
of your blood?

Who could travel
your mountains of dream,
glimpse gazelles
limp towards dawn,

see flowers
thirst through earth
for dew,

and hear at last
the sound
of swan's wings
bless the dark?

John O'Donoghue, Echoes of Memory
August 30, 2020
August 30, 2020
My first encounters with Tav were early on in Omega and Kripaulu. He was with Stan and Christina and seemed to be someone up there, almost untouchable. Many years later, I decided to try to understand more about Holotropic Breathwork so I signed up for the Holotropic Paradigm and Tav was the teacher of that module. I really learned about the INNER HEALER from Tav theoretically and experientially as he helped me with a breather. His presence with me was that of one who witnessed and recognized the power of the inner healer. He knew this breather and let her INNER HEALER do the work. I continue to trust my Inner healer. Some time after Tav said ‘You are a natural for this work. Have you considered the training”. I took this message seriously after feeling his presence during that experience. 
There were a few other encounters with Tav but the two that are a part of how Tav conveyed a oneness with life was at certification process in July of 2019 when his illness was obvious but his was still so present when my music was being played.  His tuning in to the room was so exquisite. He indicated at what level the volume should be played with such detail.  He was so attuned and so present to the energy in the room. He sat in the back and raised his hands each time he felt a change in volume was necessary. 
The third experience with Tav was at my certification meeting. When He asked what I was going to do after the module. I told him that I would be helping to facilitate with Tim O’Connell and Oliver Williams. He said “those guys need you. They need your feminine presence.” He affirmed the need for the feminine. Tav frequently talked about the divine feminine. To me this recognition on his part came from deep within his own unity with his feminine soul that made him the WHOLE PERSON he takes into this next phase of his life.
Tav, I had so few encounters with you but you have entered my heart and I do hope that you will continue to be with me. Love you. Peg
August 29, 2020
August 29, 2020
Tav made me feel safe when what I was feeling was in no way safe. His kind eyes and deep, gentle smile made it easier to progress in my breathwork sessions. He allowed me to learn to save my own life and to move well beyond that in my journey. He was my tipping point into joy and wholeness. I could never thank him adequately.

I've just learned of Tav's death two weeks after the fact. I'm grateful for the time without his loss.

Cary, your letter is gorgeous and inspired. He was blessed to have you as his partner in crime and love all these years. Just as we were to have him as a teacher. Thank you for sharing him with us so generously.

Gentle as you go.

Carol Ann
August 27, 2020
August 27, 2020
My first time I met Tav was in San Francisco at my first introduction to Stan Grof and Holotropic Breathwork. Friday evening, I wondered into the room where Tav was setting up his presentation on Movie yoga. When I walked into the room, feeling a bit out of sorts, Tav came up to me and greeted me with a warm smile. The next day, towards the end of my breathwork session, I was struggling with falling asleep after an energetic session. Tav had bad knees and had announced at the start that he may not be able to get down and do body work. In spite of his knees, he came by my space, lay down beside me and asked how I was doing. I said I was struggling with falling asleep. And in his cheerful and supportive way he said, "Go ahead, fall asleep!" That is the loving Tav that I came to know over the next several years.
I will miss him.
August 26, 2020
August 26, 2020
Ocmulgee National Monument

We eager children
came to know spirits on sacred ground—
mound builders and before—
ancient in ways of seeing and being—
We carried gifted secrets into a profane world
and to our forever lives—
We are children of the mounds and the woods—
Voices of those before us join—
Now in spirit we are one.
August 26, 2020
August 26, 2020
Dear Tav, Dear Brother,

I give thanks for our time on this earth together.
For our play and laughter
For our talk and soul searching
For your wisdom
For what you have taught me about being strong
For your gentle spirit
For your loving spirit
For sharing together so deeply ourselves, our lives
You will be with me always.

Love,
Jackie
August 24, 2020
August 24, 2020
Tav, what a blessing I had a chance to meet you. Thank you for being you and thank you for passing down so much love. It stays forever present and alive as we will keep passing it further. ❤️
August 24, 2020
August 24, 2020
A very sad time.
In the last few days the memories have come flooding back.
Meeting Tav was a real privilege. The occasions were sometimes far between, but each was a special one, filled with a sense of connection and support. Unforgettable moments in my holotropic journey.
His lectures, his passion, his humor, the music and dance and the movies. His presence.
I am deeply touched, more than words can say.
With much love.

August 23, 2020
August 23, 2020
I have a cherished memory of Tav from when I was going through the GTT training and the first Lord of the Rings movie was just released. It was in the more casual time at the end of our opening circle that someone in the group asked him what he thought about the movie and he shared that he was thrilled with it. Tav spoke about several different scenes and at one point he paused to choke back tears as he recalled a particular scene that deeply moved him.

It was the chase scene in which Arwen on horseback carries wounded Frodo to safety as she swiftly and courageously outrides the Black Riders across a river. Although the Black Riders are thwarted, Frodo is near to death from his wound and struggling for his life. Arwen, with intensity and deep compassion prays; “What grace has given me, let it pass to him …. let him be spared …. save him!”.

As Arwen was to Frodo … Tav was to those of us in his charge …he protected us as we explored the vast terrain of our inner psyches during our breathwork sessions; he held us with his prayer of grace as we wrestled with the pain of our own wounds and darkness. He inspired us toward the light of life through his care and genuine goodness. He was a dedicated and true warrior of healing. I am forever grateful to have known him.

Swift passage to the undying lands of Valinor dear Tav …. A Elbereth Gilthoniel!
August 23, 2020
August 23, 2020
I am immensely grateful to have known Tav as a person, facilitator and teacher. His heartfelt wisdom, love, teachings, humour and story telling are what stays with me.

Wishing you love, light and peace for this journey, captain!

“All that you touch you Change.
All that you Change changes you.
The only lasting truth is Change.”
― Octavia E. Butler
August 21, 2020
August 21, 2020
It's been so many decades since I met Tav, yet I clearly recall an extraordinary quality of light that he not only radiated, but in fact was. His boundless enthusiasm and energy, he greeted each moment as a miracle, with wonder. It's now decades ago, since I was with either of you, my heart is touched by the openness and depth of your sharing, Cary. I have no doubt that Tav is flying with the angels. I wish you, Cary, love and support during this time in your journey.
August 20, 2020
August 20, 2020
"... this ephemeral episode of human experience - this momentary candle, lit from the eternal flame, and blown out by the Mystery when its time is done."
The words you wrote at the end of your book, Tav - 'The Power Within.' When I read your words the first time, they landed in my heart, and re-reading them they bring ease to the loss of your presence in our midst.
So many good memories, and I'm grateful for the many opportunities to work with you over the years - you always offered a surprising and significant gem that has made me a better facilitator, and person.
My love, Cary, and a bow to you for the huge and loving walk that you have taken over these years alongside your beloved.
August 20, 2020
August 20, 2020

I was so sad to hear Tav had passed on - I wasn't expecting it and would have loved to spend more time with him. I really appreciated his authenticity, gentle, kind and comical spirit. And, how in touch he was with himself and each of us. I felt I was with a trusted brother the first time I met him. He's an inspiration to me on how to be - "comfortable in my own skin"

Cary and the Holotropic family - I wish you and yours all the best in adjusting to his passing.

Much Aloha
August 20, 2020
August 20, 2020
I met Tav at my very first GTT training in the Czech Republic. The module was “The Power Within”. I really didn’t know exactly what I had signed up for, nor did I know much about Holotropic Breathwork. I was absolutely blown away by the integrity Tav exuded. He embodied the teachings from which I came and then wove them so beautifully into the Holotropic experience. “Follow the breather”, so simple and yet so deeply profound.

“The clearer we can see who we are the better we can help others see who they are. The best thing you can do for a breather is to continue to work on yourself and not fall prey to guru status.” This was repeated by Tav over and over. The last bit of wisdom he gave me was, “Our job is to keep this process as pure as we can. I don’t see a model that is better.”

Thank you Tav for touching my heart and planting a little bit of your wisdom within.
August 20, 2020
August 20, 2020
I am deeply grateful to have experienced Tav’s huge-hearted, authentic presence during a couple of modules - and especially, as part of the certification community last summer. I hold dear numerous poignant moments of connection with him, in consultation and on the floor, when I felt completely seen, heard, encouraged, empowered. What a teacher. What a spirit. I bow to Tav and Cary for their commitment to offer such high-calibre training. The Holotropic Breathwork journey has been profound for me so far, a life-changer.
August 20, 2020
August 20, 2020
With deepest gratitude to you dear Tav for all the love you brought through and shared taking us deep within to 'trust.' Out on my balcony, your spirit in the form of a seagull soared overhead when we bid each other farewell. As I breathe you are 'home' now in Spirit, always to be treasured in my heart. May you rest in Peace dear Forever Friend.

And dear Cary and all HB folks who supported Tav in 'the work,' may we each find peace in our hearts over time. Mahalo Nui Loa with Aloha Blessings.
August 19, 2020
August 19, 2020
Bless you Tav. It's been real. What a ride, eh?
August 19, 2020
August 19, 2020
I was so fortunate to do breathwork with Tav a few years ago and spend heart-opening individual time with him. During those encounters we shared some startling synchronicities that led Tav to tell me some things I shall not forget, including that we will meet again. He truly 'saw' me. Only a handful of experiences in life have been like that. Cary, I hold a sacred opening for you in your sadness but also the joy you have had with Tav.
August 19, 2020
August 19, 2020
You will live on, in the music, in the brilliant sets that you created, that have accompanied so many of us on our largest journeys. Thank you for every   song and every note.
August 19, 2020
August 19, 2020
Sending warm virtual hugs to Cary and Bryn. I know Tav will be sorely missed.

Much Love,

Allyn & Larry
August 19, 2020
August 19, 2020
TRIBUTE TO A WARRIOR OF LIGHT

    “Bearing witness is an aggressive act. It is born out of a refusal to bow 
     down to outside pressure to revise or to repress experience, a decision
     to embrace conflict rather than conformity, to endure a lifetime of anger
     and pain rather than submit to the seductive pull of revision and
     repression. Its goal is change.”  -Kali Tal-

I have tried to write something that could capture my feelings for at least a week and have been left with the utter inadequacy of words, the boots of time frozen in place, sadness rolling into me when I least expect it, catching the edges of my breath folding me sharp as origami tucked in at the corners.

Tav Sparks (Sargent Sparks, the "Skinny Man”) was one of the most powerful teachers in my life. I had faced tanks while trooping through post-war counties, thinking all the while that I was brave. But sometimes courage is more subtle. It can reside in the still moments waiting for witness. I’m so grateful that Tav was a fierce warrior of light, holding space for all the torrents emerging... the width and breadth of the anger, depth of terror and grief, eruptions of joy. He trusted that healing would come even when I couldn’t imagine it and didn’t understand. And yet through all that, the first lesson was born...”Healing is possible.”

What a great privilege to have known him. My favorite memory was during a workshop in Phoenicia, New York, while sitting for someone and staring out the windows and into the trees cradling our space with shocks of green buried at the root. All of sudden my body shuddered with a knowing that I couldn’t avoid...every cell thundering, “In the end, there is only love.” I couldn’t stop shaking and crying. Tav came over, leaning in, wide-eyed, smiling, waiting while the music pulsed the floor. I told him what I felt, the inside truth turning out. “YES, YES!” he yelled, like a little kid who had discovered where all the treasures where buried. A facilitator put an index finger to her lips but Tav was excited now and in that charming southern drawl he whispered, “you got this, girl...that’s exactly right...stay with that” as I continued to sob at the incredible beauty. The second lesson.....”in the end there is only love.”

And so now the world is a little less bright for his absence. And yet I know his radiance and courage lives in the thousands of people believed and witnessed around the world. For me, that’s where the sacred lies. Not in reverence for the abstract divine, existing way out there somewhere but in the messy business of being deeply human. Tav showed up time after time, without promise, without guarantees, trusting in the mystery of the inner healer, despite the lessons of loss and challenges cautioning him to be wary. Despite these things, he showed up anyway, ready, expectant, deeply committed to the possibility of transformation when it is wasn’t always visible or obvious. Thank you Sargent Sparks, for all your incredible bravery, for your steadfast belief in the best of human beings, and for your commitment to love without promise of return. I will remember you always and am forever changed for your abiding kindness. May you be free from all constraints if this life. When I visit old oak trees, sturdy in the storms I will know you are near or see the aspen leaves waving their golden leaves in concert, I’ll feel you close. Sleep well and gently in the arms of all that is sacred and in the great mystery of the divine, forever.
August 19, 2020
August 19, 2020
What comes to mind most, when I think of Tav, is vast generosity--generosity of teaching, care, and service. I learned so much about facilitation from him, including the most valuable (and hardest) lesson: doing not-doing. The way he embodied both trust and grace has guided me through many challenging situations, and I am deeply grateful to have met him and been trained by him. I am sure his teaching and spirit will continue to heal and inspire so many.
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December 23, 2023
December 23, 2023
Blessings to you Cary. Such a beautiful image. With love. Donna
August 9, 2023
August 9, 2023
All my remembrances of Tav are filled with love and gratitude. Today and always.
August 3, 2023
Every breathwork and movieyoga I remember Tav and feel his support. I'm blessed I've met him in my life. Thank you, Tav, for all your heart, support, love.
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August 3, 2023
Tav, I think about you so much and miss you dearly. Thanks for everything. 
August 9, 2021
Na semana passada, no dia 03 de agosto, lembrei do aniversário de Tav. Lembrei-me especialmente, do aniversário de 50 anos, quando estávamos em Goiânia - Goiás, Brasil, durante um dos módulos do GTT.
Organizamos uma festinha à noite, para celebrarmos seu aniversário.
E, como não podia faltar, dançamos bastante como Tav adorava fazer.
Foi um dia de trabalho, de comemorações e de homenagear nosso querido Tav.
Postei inclusive, algumas fotos desse dia, no ano passado aqui no Memorial.
Tenho aprendido na vida, que a gente pode tornar a separação física das pessoas que amamos e partiram, cada vez menor. Essas pessoas queridas, estão apenas do outro lado, em uma outra dimensão. E para nos conectarmos com elas, é só fechar os olhos, respirar profundamente e deixar que o nosso coração  se conecte com elas. Assim tenho feito com pessoas da minha família, com amigos e com Tav, que sei que estão todos na LUZ e na PAZ.
É claro que a saudade existe. Mas, quando consigo entrar em contato com Tav dessa forma, sinto uma enorme alegria, porque estive com ele, porque conversamos e rimos, e isso é maravilhoso.
Gratidão por tudo Tav.
Gratidão por ter aprendido tanto com você.
Gratidão pela grande ajuda que você me deu durante as sessões de Respiração Holotrópica.
Márcia Melo de Araújo
SP, Brasil 

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